Networking. . .

So. . . I've always hated the term networking, I"ll be honest.  And still I don't love it.  I think that networking can be something negative when all it is, is networking.  But when you can build relationships, and put in effort to help others, I think networking can be an extremely positive thing.

Effective networking really isn't about connecting yourself to as many people as you can,
It's more about building personal relationship with all kinds of people,
and doing what you can do help them.

   Networking in this sense is positive. It is unselfish.  And it's FUN! :)

As each of us realize our potential to help and lift those around us, we can find the courage we need to step out of our comfort zones and make a difference.  As we reach out farther than we're use to reaching, the Lord will be able to extend his arm, through us, and we can touch the lives of others with his love. We should make networking about getting to know people,  and helping them find the place that is best for them, and I believe that we will be blessed as we strive to bless others in our network.  

I believe. . .

My Top Values are:
                   Family
               Spirituality
                            Trust
                                 Service
                                        & Passion.

My family is incredibly important to me, and at the top of all of my values  because I know that they are the people who can get me through anything.  I know that my family loves me enough to help me when I am struggling and I have been blessed with parents and siblings that I can really look up to.  Families are an amazing eternal blessing that we have been given.

Spirituality is another important value to me because I know that it is really the Lord who I can ALWAYS trust and run to when it seems there is nobody else.  This leads me to my next value. . . 

TRUST. 

Trust is a huge value to me because I believe it can completely change any relationship.  No matter who a person is, if you can build a strong foundation of trust with them, you can build a good relationship. 

Serving others is one of my top values because I can't ever seem to feel like I am really worth much at all when I am only focusing on myself, but when  I forgot myself and focus on others I am so much more able to see the Saviors guiding hand in my life, remember who I am, and see my full potential.

And finally, Passion.  I believe that the right kind of passion for something can get you just where you  want to be.  If you invest your passion in good things you will be able to reach great heights.   Passion gives you a strong sense of purpose and desire to put in the effort, even when things are hard.

Since these values are so important to me, I will stand for them.  

I believe in putting families first in life.

I believe in putting the gospel above everything else.

I believe in building trust, and keeping it.

I believe in serving others.

And I believe in doing everything with Passion. 

CoNfLiCt! . . . resolution?

I physiologically respond to conflict by literally feeling sick.  At times I get nauseous or feel dark, heavy and empty inside. I feel guilty when I know I should be solving whatever conflict is in front of me.  Eventually it is all I can think about until I fix it.  But, I hate to admit that I usually go through a period of avoidance of the conflict, I might feel anger and hold it inside, and then I either get angry or blame myself completely. Either way it just eats me up inside.  However, facing the conflict is always better on myself.
The best way for me to face conflicts is to deal with them in the very beginning stages of the conflict, instead of letting it fester inside of me.
So how do I manage my thoughts and emotions to channel the best conflict resolution?

     STEP 1: Pray about the problem and for the people I'm dealing with.

                    STEP 2: Figure out what I personally could do better.

                                  STEP 3: Confrontation.  It's gotta happen, just remember to communicate with love.

                                                 STEP 4: Be willing to compromise and have an open heart as I figure out the best way to fix whatever is creating conflict.

Where's my Motivation?

This last week as I "interacted" with different world leaders I don't know that there was one leader in particular that stood out to me other than my own, but I did realize some things about each of them.  Every leader there, whether it was Napoleon, Hitler, President Monson, or Suu Kyi, had something motivating them.  In order to be an effective leader we need to be motivated by something, and with that we will be able to motivate thsoe we lead.  I don't think that all the followers of Hitler were motivated by the things that motivated him, but since he was motivated people were drawn to following him.  It doesn't always matter what is motivating you, so much as that something is motivating you.

Now that being said, as I researched Suu Kyi I learned so much about good leadership; and I do think that good leadership comes from good motivations.  Hitler may have been a successful leader, but he wasn't a good leader.  Suu Kyi on the other hand was motivated by incredible things.  I think her fathers death was something that motivated her in a huge way.  He was killed because he fought for democracy in Burma and Suu Kyi followed her fathers example and continued the fight.  Despite all the hardships it brought upon her, the freedom of her country was most important to her and she would not give up.  I admire Suu Kyi so much for following her fathers example and I see that as an incredible motivation because it is the same kind of motivation that keeps me going.  Since my mom died when I was nine, I have since lived my life trying to follow the great example she left behind and that has been a powerful motivation throughout my life, as I think the death of Suu Kyi's father was for her.

Realizing that by finding motivation in my own life I can motivate others gives me the determination to stay on the course and be motivated.  If not for me, for those that I lead.  In my leadership position I can be an example by being excited about my calling, and by praising those I lead.  I can show that I am motivated by the love I have for the gospel and I believe as others see and feel of my motivation, they too can be motivated to do their best. And hopefully, even when my calling ends I can continue to motivate them by my example.

How to decide?

Decisions. . .Decisions. . .Decisions. . .
                                 I have a hard time making decisions at times and that doesn't make them too appealing to me. . .   So, after classes this week I  made the decision to be excited about decisions.  My decisions determine not only my actions but who I am.  There is a quote on my mirror that says,

"Happiness does not depend on what happens outside of you, but what happens inside of you."

That being said, I can decide to be happy, I decide if I am important, I decide if I'm happy with my life, and

                                        I decide what I'm going to do with today and tomorrow,

        and how I am going to look at yesterday.

Now I'll confess, a big problem I have with making decisions is the Acting. 

      Don't you ever just want things to work out?  Making decisions is hard enough.  ;)

How do I plan to fix this? Well, it's as simple as it seems.  I've gotta grab my costume, memorize my script and get the show started.  I can Act.  I can move forward and put in the work that is necessary to make my life the greatest production I could ever put on.  And even if the only member of the audience is my Heavenly Father, I want Him to be pleased with the show. 

The main decisions I make that have to do with my calling are just my every day decisions of how I am going to spend my time.  It's hard for me to make time for my calling, but my calling is very important to me so I will make time.  

 With the stresses of 

Studying, Money, Roommates, Family, etc. it is hard to decide what  needs to come first. 

 So I make the decision to be completely dedicated to my calling. 

 I will do all that I can to share my testimony and my love for the people that I lead.  

Strengths and Weaknesses

In all honestly, I don't feel qualified to be the Spring Sing director and  I could list reasons but that would only make me feel worse. So instead I'm going to focus on the strength I feel that I have with spring sing.  I have been singing since I was three years old, and loving it all along.  Music is something that is inspiring, something fun.  With the spring sing I have been able to try to teach the members of my ward these simple Disney songs, while letting them have fun with it.  At least that's what I've been trying to do. ; )   I do feel I've been blessed with a gift to sing and hopefully to help others enjoy singing.
Now talking about my group project:  I feel that my group has strengths in that we really have had an easy time getting along.  It's not hard for us to think of ideas together, and the three of us are pretty accepting of each other.  I feel like as we really put our heads together and work on making this Custodi-Olympics the greatest event- it will be.  My group is making this so easy because we do all get along and we're ready to do what we have to do to get things done. I think that we can really make this fun!

Storming The Castle. . .

Teamwork can be broken down into four stages.  Forming, Storming, Norming, & Performing. I want to touch on Forming and Storming.
    One of the major steps to creating a team is the forming process. It is incredibly important to get to know each other and get past the initial awkwardness that teams start out with. As we show the people that we are going to be working with that we care about them, and not just about what they can do for us, that's when a team can really be formed.
   Storming is the next step, and it can be crucial.  Once you've got a team really formed and it's time to get down to business, things should get complicated.   If a team is properly formed, with trust and love, than the storming will be a good phase.  We "storm" by sharing out ideas, even if they aren't the same as everyone else. As everyone shares their own opinions and  views we are able to find the BEST way, instead of simply doing the way of the person who spoke up.

One of my dysfunctions as a leader is that I have a definite fear of conflict.  I am horrible at the storming stage.    Unless I feel very very comfortable in the group I'm in, I usually just keep to myself if my idea isn't the same as someone else.  Then, if I do by change share my idea, as soon as one person doesn't agree I step down and give in to the other ideas, even if I think that my idea could work better or be more effective.  In my particular leadership role over Spring Sing, there are some times that I will do whatever everyone else says will be best. I will give my idea, but if someone doesn't like it, I throw the idea out instead of discussing it.
  Improvement in this area can come as I listen intently to others ideas, share my own, and then talk about which ideas would be best for what reasons. :)

Communication. Communication. Communication.

Communicating is something I know I struggle with, but it's something I'm working on so hopefully I'm improving.  As leaders we should realize that communicating effectively goes hand in hand with being trusted, and that's one reason why it's so important.  We can communicate better by listening.  Not just listening to what you want to hear, or even just to what is said; instead we must listen to what we see and what others feel (as we listen to what people say as well, obviously). Communicating as a leader requires an optimistic attitude; seeing everyone as above yourself and treating them that way. Then you just need organized thoughts and planning, and your communication skills as a leader will help you build trust with those you lead.
I need to be a better communicator in my calling.  I know that I can be better about communicating with my co-chair.  We both have busy schedules and if we communicated a little better we could get a lot more done in our free time.  Also I know that I should be more accepting of others ideas, and that is something I'm working on.  This may be my calling, but I realize that that doesn't make my ideas the best.  Communicating with love and acceptance is the only way I will really be able to do the most I can with my calling.

Interviewing A Hero

Today I interviewed a friend of mine, an astounding religion professor at BYU, on different aspects of leadership. He has been such a great example to me over the last few years because of his genuine concern for others and positive attitude towards life.  Brother Hank Smith is someone that I have learned loads from and I feel honored to even know him.  He has taught me about the

 importance that literally every person holds. 

Because of his incredible sincerity and friendship, 

 I was able to see my own worth and realize how much my Heavenly Father loves me; something that has made an immense difference in my life.

As I interviewed him today my respect only grew.  Brother Smith is the perfect example of someone who lives the principle of Divine Centered Leadership.  He sees that his leadership role as a father is the most important position he holds.  He is always showing concern for the one who needs it, no matter who they are, as I have been blessed to witness first hand.  I admire him so much because he has a way of letting everyone know that they are important, and investing fully in the people he meets.  To top it all off, because of Brother Smith’s humility, he has a way of making the people he leads want to be more like the Savior and create a stronger relationship with Him.  To me that is the true sign of Divine Centered Leadership: someone whose main goal in leadership is helping others come unto Christ.

Because I know Brother Smith, I now strive to be a better 

listener, friend, teacher, and all around good leader. 

"A day that begins with Victory. . . "

My Dear Alarm, 

I've decided to make a change in my life.  I realize you have been trying to be my friend and I will no longer be ignoring you for the first 5 times you try to talk to me in the morning.  I've been giving the snooze button far too much attention and you have every right to feel betrayed.  I will be better. 

Sincerely, 

          Sarah Jane

So how do I learn to love my alarm?

Step #1: Make a playlist of happy songs that I will enjoy waking up to in the morning.

Step #2: Set my alarm for a reasonable time. 

 (Setting it for 30 minutes earlier than I  actually plan on waking up just isn't going to work anymore. . . .)

Step #3:  Go to bed at a decent time.

"A day that begins with victory is on its way to many others; 

and a day that begins with defeat is on its way to many others." -Author Unknown

   

Divine Centered Leadership

I was able to really get to know a girl in my ward this week, to an extent deeper than I would have thought I could.  She was going through a hard time and I made the decision that I was going to be there for her.  She is someone I look up to so much, and I just wanted to really get to know her heart. So, I decided I needed to do more than just pray for her.  As I sat at home with some friends I had a thought to go visit her, since I knew she was having a rough time.  I stood up and walked to her apartment to ask her how she was doing; I sat listening and comforting her the best I could. Through the rest of the week I checked up on her, and did my best to let her know I cared; along with praying for her to find the strength she needed.  I have grown to love her so much this last week as I have seen her incredible spirit and come to know her heart.

This experience has been another witness to me that as we serve others we are able to see them as the Children of God that they are; and as we recognize God's Children, and see them the way He would, I believe that we are able to lead more like the Savior would.

Leading Now?

Most of us think of leaderships as something more than just who we are.  Leadership is holding a high position in a club or organization.  Leadership is planning activities or service.  Leadership is teaching. Google defines it as 
1. The action of leading a group of people or an organization.
2. The state or position of being a leader.

As I've thought about the ways that I could be leading now, I've more fully realized that leadership is simply acting in a way that someone somewhere will see as an example, whether good or bad.  And even though most of us don't realize it, we are always being leaders and we decide through our actions what kind of leaders we will be. 

I am a leader in my home and in my callings. In the way that I treat the random people I meet.  I am a leader by attending college and going to my classes.  Mainly, I consider myself a leader with my friends.  Not because I think I am an incredible example, but because they allow me to be the person I know that I want to be. I am a leader throughout my life because I choose to be. And I choose to be a leader who will influence for good. 


The main leadership quality I posses is the ability to care.  I've recently realized that it is such a gift to be able to look at people I don't even know and love them before I even know them.  I believe that as we first meet people we should assume that we are going to like them, and find all the good things we can in their personality and in their actions.  Instead of making people prove that we should love them, we assume we will love them and keep loving them even if we are proven wrong. 


The place of leadership I am trying to improve, and that I will use this class to help me improve, will be leadership in my church calling. I have just been called to Co-direct the Spring Sing for my ward.  This means I will be leading as many people in my ward as I can get involved with our ward's 7 minute musical. I am super excited to apply the principles I learn this semester to this calling!